I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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