I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I'm bleeding and have questions
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
