oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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