they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
