No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
