I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
he was CRYING into my vagina
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Randomize