just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
