so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
