I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
