I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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