What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
