I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Randomize
