fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
