508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Girls should come with a carfax report
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
