put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
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