I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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