Heybabeimwearingurpanties
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
