Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
