"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
