Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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