The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
