All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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