Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
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