In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
