You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
