he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
