I wannas sexs uuuuu
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
