thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
only you would photoshop your dick
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Randomize