i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Do vagina's smell?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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