Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
So here I am, sexting at work.
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