I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
