I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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