Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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