It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
A bitchslap is in order.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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