im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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