The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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