Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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