paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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