Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
