; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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