yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
