im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
jump out the window naked night went bad
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
