When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Randomize
