Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
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