That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Randomize
