hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize