Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
