What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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