i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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