New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
